People Who Wear Orange are Less Likely to be Shot

Go_orange_with_balloons_(4505724006)-2

This orange-obsessed woman almost certainly has lived to tell her tale of not getting shot.

I heard a headline some years ago on the radio that said that people who wear orange are seven times less likely to be shot. I can attest that it is most definitely true! I have continually worn something orange from that time and have never once been shot!

I wonder how people discovered this profound revelation about the magic of that color. Do the police keep track of the colors of shooting victims’ clothes? I’ll have to ask the next time I get pulled over for driving too slow.

Orange is a very cheerful color. I suspect that a potential cold-blooded murderer, as he stares over the barrel of his Jennings .22, cannot help but change his hateful mind at the sight of a beaming human target clad in bright and happy orange. The melted heart of the would-be shooter aches with remorse, and he must stow his gun away until he can recompose himself.

According to the most well-respected chromotherapists, the color orange cheers and energizes, and stimulates creativity. It opens the hapless soul to new and blissful possibilities. For some reason these therapists also relate orange to body organs like the “uterus, large bowel, prostate, ovaries and testes”[1], it’s something to do with chakras of the belly, we’re told, but I am always very skeptical of such unproven theories.

hare-krishnas

I shudder to think of what might have happened to these dapper young gentleman were they not wearing their orange robes.

Very few people regularly wear orange, if at all, apart from Hare Krishnas (who I have not seen in quite a while; do they still hang around airports?) and Buddhists. Orange is one of the least popular colors, and cool people don’t like to wear it, I guess. I have tried to change the minds of my friends and family about this wonderful color, but most of them just shake their heads at the babblings of an old baboon.

A young friend of mine named Wigglesworth once asked me why I always wear something orange. He refused to believe my answer that orange reduces our likelihood of getting shot. He ridiculed me and branded me a fool, but I could only smile smugly in my superior knowledge. Some time later, that same young man found himself pinned to a mail box with a gun waving in his face. After surrendering his wallet to the thief, Mr. Wigglesworth said that the mugger aimed the pistol to fire into his skull. But then the thief’s eyes focused beyond my terrified friend. Without a word, the mugger hurried away, tucking the gun into the wasteband of his pants. Wigglesworth spun around. To his astonishment, a bright orange garbage truck had parked across the street to empty a dumpster. Wigglesworth fell to his knees and wept. If not for that pacifying orange hue, my young friend would surely have eaten that bullet!

Historically very few national movements have utilized the properties of orange to their advantage, its neutralizing characters unknown in those times as they are mostly unknown now.

Vromm_Hendrick_Cornelisz_A_Castle_with_a_Dutch_Ship_Sailing_Near-2

The Dutch rose in might with an orange stripe in their ensign, then fell into mediocrity with a red one. Will we never learn?

One major exception is the Dutch Revolt of the 1500’s. As the Spanish Netherlands transformed into not only a Protestant country, but a die-hard Calvinist one, uber-Catholic Spain sought to repress this movement, sparking riots and rebellion among the Dutch. At first the fires of revolt did not gain much ground, and the Spanish all but doused it by 1570. But when the Dutch Sea Beggar pirates adopted orange banners in inspiration of their leader, Prince William of Orange-Nassau, the fortunes of the rebellion turned dramatically in the rebels’ favor. Their capture in 1572 of the seaport of Brielle (Brill) marked the first of many victories that established the Republic of the Netherlands.[2]

Some people are now waking up to the protective powers of orange. A group of kids in Chicago started Project Orange Tree to fight against the gun violence that senselessly claims so many young lives.[3] They urge everyone to wear orange as a sign of solidarity to peacefully fight against gun violence. They certainly chose the right color!

p.o.t.flyer_2

“We wear orange because we don’t want to be shot.” People are starting to awaken to the peaceful power of orange.

If everyone wore orange everywhere in the world, all of the time, surely the earth would be seven times less likely to erupt into war and senseless violence. But even if that scenario doesn’t play out, we can protect ourselves and our little children and grandchildren by wearing orange every single day and giving them orange sweaters for Christmas this year!

[1] Colour Therapy Healing. “Orange the Colour.” Colour Properties. Colour Therapy Healing, n.d. Web. 9 Oct. 2013. http://www.colourtherapyhealing.com/colour/orange.php

[2] Because of the effects of sea salt on the orange dye, from 1630 the Dutch increasingly used red in their flags instead of orange. Interestingly, the fortunes of the Dutch fell in proportion to their use of the red, white, and blue standard instead of the orange, white, and blue. By the time of the Batavian Republic (1795-1806), the Netherlands had become a second-rate power.

[3] We Are Not Alone. “Please Don’t Shoot. They Are Wearing Orange.” Chicago Is the World. We Are Not Alone, 9 Apr. 2013. Web. 9 Oct. 2013. http://www.chicagoistheworld.org/notalone/2013/04/please-dont-shoot-they-are-wearing-orange/

Advertisements

2 thoughts on “People Who Wear Orange are Less Likely to be Shot

  1. A quick google search tells me that there hasn’t ever been a shooting at Syracuse university, though one Syracuse grad was shot Colorado. I guess he wasn’t wearing his school colors.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s